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Sunday, March 29, 2015

The Girl Code For Guys

Okay, let me just say that I'm not your typical middle school girl. I don't go to dances to have fun, I go to them to annoy others and ruin THEIR fun. I don't care about clothing or makeup, I only dress nicely so I don't seem like a slob (ahem, Maria). So this girl code probably only applies to me and my Besties. Let's call it the Freak's Girl Code. Who cares if I'm a freak? At least I'm something.

The "LOL" Guy

This isn't the funny dude in math class who jokes around 24/7. This is the guy who has messed up SO BADLY that he still appears in conversations at sleepover parties years later. My friends and I have one and the reminder of this guy makes us laugh so hard.

The "Girlfriend's Boyfriend" Guy

He's your friends boyfriend but that just means you can poke fun at him. Of course, your friend doesn't actually know that (and neither does her boyfriend) but that's the point. Nothing like secret gossip (I'm sounding like a game show host right now). 

The "Grumpy Cat" Guy

No pictures of him, EVER, or he'll freak. This is the kind of guy who's grumpy 24/7 (seven-eleven. Okay, THAT was random but whatever) but somehow ends up with the most outgoing guy in your grade.... It's fun to annoy him because if his reactions.

The "Creepy-Weird" Guy

There are different levels of weird. There's the endearing weird where really, it's just most "daring" then "weird", the "mediocore" weird (less daring, more daring-stalker) and then there's "creepy" weird where it's outright stalking. And choking. Yes, this creepy weird guy actually choked me. Well, if I'm going to suicide at least I know strangulation isn't an option...?

The "Can't Get A Grip" Guy

You can never tell what he's thinking....one minute he's the sweetest person you've ever met and the next he's the grumpiest. Maybe moody would've been a better title.

The "Okay, I Actually Like Him" Guy

A.K.A. the Crush. Need I say anymore? 

The "Pervert" Guy

Makes a pass at every attractive girl. I have a friend who was a victim. She said he grabbed her butt I asked her really because I knew him and he seemed like an average guy. Guess not.

The "Hypocrite" Guy

You know the one. It's the one person who tries to go against the tide...and utterly fails. Everyone wants to buy Kapow pops? He goes on the swings. Teacher leaves? Trust him to try to substitute. Some days he's less daring and more hypocritical. Especially when he's also talking it up.

The "Boyfriend" Guy

He's your friends boyfriend and the guy who sits behind you in homeroom. Personally he's okay if a little messed up but you definitely thought your friend was lesbian until she started dating him. Definitely.

The "Gay But Not" Guy

This is a more personal thing. See the guy description above? Yup, these two are one dude. Let's call this guy Ethan. Ethan used to sit behind me in homeroom and he claims that his desk buddy (who's male) likes to sniff him. And Ethan claims that he likes it. Sometimes I wonder how my friend even got attracted to him in the first place...

Well, I hoped you liked this post. If you don't....well, can't blame you for having your own opinion. Carpe diem and seize the cake.

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